Email Variety

A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute refugee claimant outside a Maryland immigration office.
‘My good man,’ the fairy said, ‘I’ve been told to grant you three wishes, since you just arrived in the United States with your wife and three children.’
The man told the fairy. ‘Well, where I come from we don’t have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.’
The fairy looked at the man’s almost toothless grin and — PING! — he had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth!
‘What else?’ asked the fairy, ‘two more to go.’
The refugee claimant now got bolder.
‘I need a big house with a three car garage in Annapolis on the water, with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my
relatives who still live in my country. I want to bring them all over here…’ — PING! — In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ in an upscale neighborhood, overlooking the bay.
‘One more wish’, said the fairy, waving her wand.
‘I want to be like an American with American clothes instead of these torn clothes, and a baseball cap instead of this turban. And I want to have white skin, like the White Americans. — PING! — The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans, a Baltimore Orioles T-shirt and a baseball cap. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon.
‘What happened to my new teeth?’ he wailed. ‘Where is my new house?’
The fairy said: “Tough luck, Mac, Now that you are a WHITE American, you have to fend for yourself.”