Posts Tagged ‘Boy’

When You’re from the Country, Your Perception is a Little Different

Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

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An Illinois farmer in his pickup, drove to a neighbor’s, and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door.

“Is your Dad home?”
“No sir, he isn’t; he went to town.”

“Well, is your Mother here?”
“No sir, she went to town with Dad.”

“How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?”
“No sir, He went with Mom and Dad.”

The rancher stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself.
“Is there anything I can do for you? I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message.”

“Well,” said the rancher uncomfortably, “I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It’s about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Suzie, pregnant.”‘

The boy thought for a moment. “You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the hog, but I don’t know how much he charges for Howard.”

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A Knock Should Work, Shouldn’t It?

Tuesday, December 7th, 2010

A LITTLE THREE YEAR OLD BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET. HIS MOTHER THINKS HE HAS BEEN IN THERE TOO LONG, SO SHE GOES IN TO SEE WHAT’S UP.

THE LITTLE BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET READING A BOOK. BUT ABOUT EVERY 10 SECONDS OR SO HE PUTS THE BOOK DOWN, GRIPS ONTO TO THE TOILET SEAT WITH HIS LEFT HAND AND HITS HIMSELF ON TOP OF THE HEAD WITH HIS RIGHT HAND.

HIS MOTHER SAYS: “BILLY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?YOU’VE BEEN IN HERE FOR A WHILE.. BILLY SAYS: “I’M FINE, MOMMY.. I JUST HAVEN’T GONE ‘DOODY’ YET.” MOTHER SAYS: “OK, YOU CAN STAY HERE A FEW MORE MINUTES. BUT, BILLY, WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF ON THE HEAD?”

BILLY SAYS: “WORKS FOR KETCHUP.”

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Wet Pants

Tuesday, September 21st, 2010

A third grade classroom……. There
is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and
all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his
feet and the front of his pants are wet. He
thinks his heart is going to stop because he
cannot possibly imagine how this has
happened. It’s never happened before, and
he knows that when the boys find out he will
never hear the end of it. When the girls find
out, they’ll never speak to him again as long as
he lives…

The boy believes his heart is going to stop;
he puts his head down and prays this prayer,
‘Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now!
Five minutes from now I’m dead meat.’

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher
with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered.

As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named
Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water..
Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps
the bowl of water in the boy’s lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is
saying to himself, ‘Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!’

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of
ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The
teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym
shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the
other children are on their hands and knees
cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is
wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule
that should have been his has been transferred
to someone else – Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out.
You’ve done enough, you klutz!’

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for
the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and
whispers, ‘You did that on purpose, didn’t you?’
Susie whispers back, ‘I wet my pants once too…’

May God help us see the opportunities that are always
around us to do good…

Remember……. Just going to the synagogue (or to church
or to a mosque) doesn’t make you holy any more than standing
in your garage makes you a car..

Each and everyone one of us has gone through tough times at
one point or another. Always keep the faith. Faith will brighten
your days, no matter what your religion. Shema Yisrael, Adonai
Elohenu, Adonai Echad!

My instructions were to pick people that I wanted to have an inspirational message as we reflect on the year past, ask to be absolved of our sins, repent, pray, and act charitably. Please
pass this to at least four (4) people you want to be blessed.

This prayer is powerful, and prayer is one of the best gifts
we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards. Let’s
continue to pray for one another.

The Prayer:

Adonai, God, Allah,
I ask You to bless my friends, relatives and
those that I care deeply for, who are reading
this right now.
Where there is pain, give them Your peace and
mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a
renewed confidence through Your grace. Where
there is need, I ask you to fulfill their needs.
Bless their homes, families, finances, their
goings and their comings… Amen.

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The Birds and the Bees of 21st Century…

Monday, September 20th, 2010

Daddy, how was I born?

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A little boy goes to his father and asks ‘Daddy, how was I born?’

The father answers, ‘ Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other. There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button , nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:

Scroll down….You’ ll love this …….

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loveit

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babywinking

‘You got Male!’

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Prayer for Ice Cream

Thursday, June 3rd, 2010

Sometimes we forget the really important things in life.

prayingboy

Last week, I took my grand-children to a restaurant. My six-year-old grand-son asked if he could say grace.
As we bowed our heads he said, “God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Nana gets us ice cream for dessert. And liberty and justice for all! Amen!”

Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, I heard a woman remark, “That’s what’s wrong with this country. Kids today don’t even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!”
Hearing this, my grand-son burst into tears and asked me, “Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?”

As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job, and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table. He winked at my grand-son and said, “I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.”
“Really?” my grand-son asked.
“Cross my heart,” the man replied. Then, in a theatrical whisper, he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), “Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes.”

Naturally, I bought my grand-children ice cream at the end of the meal. My grand-son stared at his for a moment, and then did something I will remember the rest of my life.

He picked up his sundae and, without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, “Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already.”

The End

Please keep it moving. Sometimes, we all need some ice cream.

I hope God sends you some ice cream today!

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Good Night, Sleep Tight..

Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010

Maybe it’s the smell that knocked the boy out in the first place.dog&boy

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If You “Tear Up” Go Ahead, Who’s Watching?

Friday, January 8th, 2010

boy

In Calgary, Alberta a 26-year-old mother stared down at her 6 year old son, who was dying of terminal leukemia. Although her heart was filled with sadness, she also had a strong feeling of determination.
Like any parent, she wanted her son to grow up & fulfill all his dreams. Now that was no longer possible.. the leukemia would see to that. But she still wanted her son’s dream to come true.

She took her son’ s hand and asked, ‘Billy, did you ever think about what you wanted to be once you grew up? Did you ever dream and wish what you would do with your life?’
Mommy, ‘I always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up.’
Mom smiled back and said, ‘Let’s see if we can make your wish come true.’

Later that day she went to her local fire Department in Calgary, where she met Fireman Bob, who had a heart as big as Alberta. She explained her son’s final wish and asked if it might be possible to give her 6 year-old son a ride around the block on a fire engine.
Fireman Bob said, ‘Look, we can do better than that. If you’ll have your son ready at seven o’clock Wednesday morning, we’ll make him an honorary Fireman for the whole day. He can come down to the fire station, eat with us, go out on all the fire calls, the whole nine yards! And if you’ll give us his sizes, we’ll get a real fire uniform for him, with a real fire hat – not a toy – one with the emblem of the Calgary Fire Department on it, and a yellow slicker like we wear and rubber boots. They’re all manufactured right here in Calgary, so we can get them fast.’

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Three days later Fireman Bob picked up Billy, dressed him in his uniform and escorted him from his hospital bed to the waiting hook and ladder truck. Billy got to sit on the back of the truck and help steer it back to the fire station. He was in heaven.

There were three fire calls in Calgary that day and Billy got to go out on all three calls. He rode in the different fire engines, the Paramedic’s’ van, and even the fire chief’s car. He was also videotaped for the
local news program.

Having his dream come true, with all the love and attention that was lavished upon him, so deeply touched Billy, that he lived three months longer than any doctor thought possible.

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One night all of his vital signs began to drop dramatically and the head nurse, who believed in the hospice concept – that no one should die alone, began to call the family members to the hospital. Then she remembered the day Billy had spent as a Fireman, so she called the Fire Chief and asked if it would be possible to send a fireman in uniform to the hospital to be with Billy as he made his transition.
The chief replied, ‘We can do better than that. We’ll be there in five minutes.. Will you please do me a favor?
When you hear the sirens screaming and see the lights flashing, will you announce over the PA system that there is not a fire? It’s the department coming to see one of its finest members one more time. And will you open the window to his room?’

About five minutes later a hook and ladder truck arrived at the hospital and extended its ladder up to Billy’s third floor open window boy2 sixteen fire-fighters climbed up the ladder into Billy’s room. With his mother’s permission, they hugged him and held him and told him how much they LOVED him.

With his dying breath, Billy looked up at the fire chief and said, ‘Chief, am I really a fireman now?’
‘Billy, you are, and The Head Chief, Jesus, is holding your hand,’ the chief said..

With those words, Billy smiled and said, ‘I know, He’s been holding my hand all day, and the angels have been
singing..’ He closed his eyes one last time.

Please pass this to at least four people you want to be blessed.

(I was told, this is a true story)

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Children’s ‘Quotes’

Saturday, October 10th, 2009

LOOK OUT FOR THE LAST STORY…. IT WILL KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF

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Teacher Debbie Moon’s first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said:
‘I know all about adoption, I was adopted..’
‘What does it mean to be adopted?’, asked another child.
‘It means’, said the girl, ‘that you grew in your mommy’s heart instead of her tummy!’

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On my way home one day, I stopped to watch a Little League base ball game that was being played in a
park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first-base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was ‘We’re behind 14 to nothing,’ he answered with a smile.
‘Really,’ I said. ‘I have to say you don’t look very discouraged.’
‘Discouraged?’, the boy asked with a puzzled look on his face… ‘Why should we be discouraged? We haven’t
been up to bat yet.’

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Whenever I’m disappointed with my spot in life, I stop and think about little Jamie Scott. Jamie was trying out for a part in the school play. His mother told me that he’d set his heart on being in it, though she feared he would not be chosen.. On the day the parts were awarded, I went with her to collect him after school. Jamie rushed up to her, eyes shining with pride and excitement..
‘Guess what, Mom,’ he shouted, and then said those words that will remain a lesson to me….’I've been chosen to clap and cheer.’

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An eye witness account from New York City, on a cold day in December, some years ago: A little boy,
about 10-years-old, was standing before a shoe store on the roadway, barefooted, peering through the window, and shivering with cold. A lady approached the young boy and said,
‘My, but you’re in such deep thought staring in that window!’
‘I was asking God to give me a pair of shoes,’ was the boy’s reply.
The lady took him by the hand, went into the store, and asked the clerk to get half a dozen pairs of socks
for the boy. She then asked if he could give her a basin of water and a towel. He quickly brought them to her. She took the little fellow to the back part of the store and, removing her gloves, knelt down, washed
his little feet, and dried them with the towel. By this time, the clerk had returned with the socks.. Placing a pair upon the boy’s feet, she purchased him a pair of shoes.. She tied up the remaining pairs of socks and gave them to him.. She patted him on the head and said:
‘No doubt, you will be more comfortable now.’
As she turned to go, the astonished kid caught her by the hand, and looking up into her face, with tears
in his eyes, asked her:
‘Are you God’s wife?’

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What Is Your Excuse?

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

Your attitude towards life defines not only who you are, but the quality of life you are after.

Whatever it is that has been bugging you, doesn’t seem so bad anymore, does it? If only we all could have the spirit that this little boy has!

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Is the Glass Half Empty or Half Full?

Monday, September 7th, 2009

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: “I am blind, please help.” There were only a few coins in the hat.

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A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.

Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, “Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?”

blindboy02

The man said, “I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.”
I wrote: “Today is a beautiful day but I cannot see it.”

Both signs told people that the boy was blind. But the first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people that they were so lucky that they were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?

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Moral of the Story: Be thankful for what you have.. Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently and positively.

When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile. Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. Keep the faith and drop the fear.

The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling…
And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

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