Posts Tagged ‘Robot’

A Bar Joke

Sunday, August 29th, 2010

Guy goes into a bar, there’s a robot bartender.

The robot says, “What will you have?”

The guy says, “Martini.”

The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man,

“What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, ”168.”

The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology.

The guy leaves, but he is curious…So he goes back into the bar.

The robot bartender says, “What will you have?”

The guy says, “Martini.”

Again, the robot makes a great martini gives it to the man and says,

“What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, “100.”

The robot then starts to talk about NASCAR, Kokannee, and John Deere tractors.

The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time.

He goes back into the bar.

The robot says, “What will you have?”

The guy says, “Martini,” and the robot brings him another great martini.

The robot then says, “What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, ”Uh, about 50.”

The robot leans in real close and says,……

“So, you people still happy you voted for Obama?”

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The Salesman’s Robot

Friday, August 7th, 2009

John was a salesman’s delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11-year-old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over two hours late.
“Where have you been? Why are you over two hours late getting home?” asked John.
“Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,” said Tommy. The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.
“Son,” said John, “this robot is a lie detector. Now tell us where you really were after school.”
“We went to Bobby’s house and watched a movie,” said Tommy.
“What did you watch?” asked Marsha.
“The Ten Commandments,” answered Tommy. The robot went around to Tommy and slapped him again, knocking him off his chair once more. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up from the floor, sat down, and said, “I am sorry I lied. We really watched an R-rated movie.”
“I am ashamed of you, son,” said John. “When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.” The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears, and said, “Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can’t be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!”

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

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